I like Chunky Monkey
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
NEW BLOG
Occasionally, I'll write a post about one of my "Passions of the Moment." Rather than filling up this blog with them; I decided to post a new one each day in my NEW BLOG! I named it "I Like Blogger." There's a link on my profile.
Check it out!
Check it out!
L + O + V + E = COURAGE?
I feel like I'm standing at a doorway in my life and staring into the keyhole.
Here's where my mind was all last week: Are courage and love the same thing? Or are they so intertwined that they are inseparable? Can cowardice and love coexist...cohabitate in a soul? Are they mutually exclusive forces? And what about the mother who makes decisions to protect her children? Is she motivated by fear? Are her actions loving? I guess it takes courage to tell a child, "No." Does all love require courage? Is love the only weapon we can use to defeat anxiety and fear?
I wrote an earlier entry about three people I admire. While journaling about them, I realized their common trait: they weren't too afraid to love. Don't misunderstand. Their stories didn't involve romantic love between two people, but love as a general motivation for living. Love was the reason for everything that they did...or dreamed of accomplishing. Love made them dream big. But fear could have kept them from acting on those dreams: fear of rejection, of failure, of repeated mistakes, of loneliness, of discomfort... cripling, disabling fear. But in all three stories, love won out. Fear was repelled by love, cast out, displaced...love left no place for fear...because love had filled them up (perfect love casts out all fear), made a home for Himself in them. He had taken ownership and recharted their courses.
I want to be like that.
Here's where my mind was all last week: Are courage and love the same thing? Or are they so intertwined that they are inseparable? Can cowardice and love coexist...cohabitate in a soul? Are they mutually exclusive forces? And what about the mother who makes decisions to protect her children? Is she motivated by fear? Are her actions loving? I guess it takes courage to tell a child, "No." Does all love require courage? Is love the only weapon we can use to defeat anxiety and fear?
I wrote an earlier entry about three people I admire. While journaling about them, I realized their common trait: they weren't too afraid to love. Don't misunderstand. Their stories didn't involve romantic love between two people, but love as a general motivation for living. Love was the reason for everything that they did...or dreamed of accomplishing. Love made them dream big. But fear could have kept them from acting on those dreams: fear of rejection, of failure, of repeated mistakes, of loneliness, of discomfort... cripling, disabling fear. But in all three stories, love won out. Fear was repelled by love, cast out, displaced...love left no place for fear...because love had filled them up (perfect love casts out all fear), made a home for Himself in them. He had taken ownership and recharted their courses.
I want to be like that.
Friday, December 02, 2005
DANIEL IST EIN GUTER BRUDER.
No need to send a search party. I'm not dead, just off on an extended weekend. No posts until next week sometime. Hope my multiple postings today will tide you over. (This special message is for the 3 of you who read this blog.) If you get bored, you could post a comment (especially you, Daniel!)
SM + ART
Yet another installment in my ongoing discussion of a favorite subject:
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, I asked my friend Erin to offer her own definition. She's an artist; her work is whimsical. It reminds me of story book illustrations. Here's what she had to say on the subject:
"Art is a process by which an artist (read: any person breathing) removes from themselves an idea, image, emotion, or statement to share with others in a heard, felt, seen, tasted, or even smelt way. (Wouldn't you consider a perfumer an artist?). Art is sensory and emotional."
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, I asked my friend Erin to offer her own definition. She's an artist; her work is whimsical. It reminds me of story book illustrations. Here's what she had to say on the subject:
"Art is a process by which an artist (read: any person breathing) removes from themselves an idea, image, emotion, or statement to share with others in a heard, felt, seen, tasted, or even smelt way. (Wouldn't you consider a perfumer an artist?). Art is sensory and emotional."
A R T P O V
My friend Algernon had something to say about Art. He should. He is a professional artist. He's actually the best portrait artist I've ever met. And his graphic design blows my mind. Anyway, he explained it to me this way -
"I have a particular way of looking at things. I see the world in a unique way. Art allows me to share that viewpoint with other people. They get to see the world from my vantage point."
How beautiful is that?
"I have a particular way of looking at things. I see the world in a unique way. Art allows me to share that viewpoint with other people. They get to see the world from my vantage point."
How beautiful is that?
KATIE & AMBER
Katie and Amber have been best friends forever. They share lots of inside jokes. I've picked up on a few of them. My favorite one goes way back to when they were little girls. I think they got the idea for it from some kids' book or something Amber's Mom used to do with her. Once in a while they will do this routine. The dialogue is always different, but the theme is the same.
Amber will ask, "Katie, do you love me?"
And Katie will say, "Yes."
And Amber will ask, "Will you always love me, Katie?"
"Yes, Amber, I will always love you."
"What if something bad were to happen to me? Would you still love me then?"
"Like what, Amber?"
"What if I had stinky breath? Would you still love me?"
"Yes. I'd love you and give you a breath mint!"
"Well what if I became a clown and wore big shoes and had a big red nose?"
"Of course I'd love you, and I'd buy you a little car for you and your clown friends."
"What if I grew a second mouth - on my forehead? Would you love me then?"
"Yes Amber. I'd love you and listen to you twice as much!"
"But what if it were really bad? What if I grew warts all over my nose and a hunchback and breathed fire and grew really long black toenails that smelled like rotten peaches?"
"I'd still love you. And I'd I'd be your friend Amber! Because that's what friends are for!"
"I love you, too, Katie."
"I know you do, Amber."
Amber will ask, "Katie, do you love me?"
And Katie will say, "Yes."
And Amber will ask, "Will you always love me, Katie?"
"Yes, Amber, I will always love you."
"What if something bad were to happen to me? Would you still love me then?"
"Like what, Amber?"
"What if I had stinky breath? Would you still love me?"
"Yes. I'd love you and give you a breath mint!"
"Well what if I became a clown and wore big shoes and had a big red nose?"
"Of course I'd love you, and I'd buy you a little car for you and your clown friends."
"What if I grew a second mouth - on my forehead? Would you love me then?"
"Yes Amber. I'd love you and listen to you twice as much!"
"But what if it were really bad? What if I grew warts all over my nose and a hunchback and breathed fire and grew really long black toenails that smelled like rotten peaches?"
"I'd still love you. And I'd I'd be your friend Amber! Because that's what friends are for!"
"I love you, too, Katie."
"I know you do, Amber."
PAINT BY NUMBERS
I've been thinking about these 2 paintings this month. Maybe it's because I was having a discussion with a friend about art. What is the definition of "Art," anyway?
BROKEN RECORD
OH THANK GOODNESS!! I thought I was going insane. I kept hearing this phrase repeating in my brain like Chinese water torture or Native American war drums, "Hannity & Colmes... Hannity & Colmes... HANNITY & COLMES!!!"
But I had no idea what this phrase meant or where my brain picked up this piece of mental belly button lint that just wouldn't seem to shake out of the dryer filter that is my brain. My best guess up until just a minute ago was that it must be some brand of shoes. That explanation seemed to fit the name, but it still didn't explain how the phrase turned into a skipping record on my mental turntable.
But then, while typing last night, I glanced up at the TV and noticed the show on FNC. You'll never guess which one it was... I feel so much better; now I can forget it. It all makes sense now. Whenever my brother is home, the TV stays on Fox News. He even has his satellite radio tuned to it. Duh! Of course it's a news show.
Does your brain ever get stuck in spin cycle, or am I alone on this one?
But I had no idea what this phrase meant or where my brain picked up this piece of mental belly button lint that just wouldn't seem to shake out of the dryer filter that is my brain. My best guess up until just a minute ago was that it must be some brand of shoes. That explanation seemed to fit the name, but it still didn't explain how the phrase turned into a skipping record on my mental turntable.
But then, while typing last night, I glanced up at the TV and noticed the show on FNC. You'll never guess which one it was... I feel so much better; now I can forget it. It all makes sense now. Whenever my brother is home, the TV stays on Fox News. He even has his satellite radio tuned to it. Duh! Of course it's a news show.
Does your brain ever get stuck in spin cycle, or am I alone on this one?
JON HEDER
Oh my gravy! I watched an interview on HBO with Jon Heder (you know, the actor who portrayed Napoleon Dynamite). He looked so different! I wouldn't have recognized him if they hadn't had a big ND poster sitting next to him.
Did you know that he drew all the pictures that "Napoleon" drew? That's pretty impressive. He said that he tried to make them as terrible as possible.
That movie is in my Top 10. They say people either love it or hate it.
Since the battle lines have been drawn; I guess I should ask which side you've chosen. So are you pro or anti dynamite?
Did you know that he drew all the pictures that "Napoleon" drew? That's pretty impressive. He said that he tried to make them as terrible as possible.
That movie is in my Top 10. They say people either love it or hate it.
Since the battle lines have been drawn; I guess I should ask which side you've chosen. So are you pro or anti dynamite?
Thursday, December 01, 2005
Wednesday, November 30, 2005
DA BOMB
The Career Key is a total dud. Can't believe I just payed for it, but it was less than $10. I guess you get what you pay for. It was less helpful than going to the library to research jobs.
INVENTING?
I took Princeton Review's free career quiz . I'll cut and paste the results below in case I want to see them later. These forced-choice format things can be so one-sided. The style is, "Would you rather eat a fly or an ant?" I think I'm anything but quiet and solitary. But I guess I can be sometimes, like when I'm trying to write...
"People with blue Interests like job responsibilities and occupations that involve creative, humanistic, thoughtful, and quiet types of activities. Blue Interests include abstracting, theorizing, designing, writing, reflecting, and originating, which often lead to work in editing, teaching, composing, inventing, mediating, clergy, and writing."
"People with yellow styles perform their job responsibilities in a manner that is orderly and planned to meet a known schedule. They prefer to work where things get done with a minimum of interpretation and unexpected change. People with a yellow style tend to be orderly, cautious, structured, loyal, systematic, solitary, methodical, and organized, and usually thrive in a research-oriented, predictable, established, controlled, measurable, orderly environment. You will want to choose a work environment or career path in which your style is welcomed and produces results. "
"People with blue Interests like job responsibilities and occupations that involve creative, humanistic, thoughtful, and quiet types of activities. Blue Interests include abstracting, theorizing, designing, writing, reflecting, and originating, which often lead to work in editing, teaching, composing, inventing, mediating, clergy, and writing."
"People with yellow styles perform their job responsibilities in a manner that is orderly and planned to meet a known schedule. They prefer to work where things get done with a minimum of interpretation and unexpected change. People with a yellow style tend to be orderly, cautious, structured, loyal, systematic, solitary, methodical, and organized, and usually thrive in a research-oriented, predictable, established, controlled, measurable, orderly environment. You will want to choose a work environment or career path in which your style is welcomed and produces results. "
PASSION OF THE MOMENT: PEPPERMINT TEA
Often I get swept away in a 5 minute crush. Tonight's is Celestial Seasonings Peppermint Natural Herb Tea. It's the perfect way to cap off a winter's night. What are the ingredients? Peppermint leaves. No calories + no caffeine = guilt free YUM. It's so good I wanted to share it with you! Enjoy!
I'M DREAMING OF A TV CHRISTMAS
I just finished watching "Christmas at Rockefeller Center." When the program started, I excitedly called my mom and dad to see if they were watching, too. But the folks were watching Rudolph. For some reason, I'm so much more prone to being a couch potato at Christmas time.
I think it starts at Thanksgiving when I watch the parade. I LOVE THE PARADE! This year's was great, and I was totally annoyed with Fox News for trying to make a scandal out of a grounded balloon. If you don't know what I'm talking about, google it and then tell me what you think...
There's just something about Holiday Specials/Movies/Cartoons that captures my imagination. I love watching them. Especially White Christmas. Which one is your favorite?
I think it starts at Thanksgiving when I watch the parade. I LOVE THE PARADE! This year's was great, and I was totally annoyed with Fox News for trying to make a scandal out of a grounded balloon. If you don't know what I'm talking about, google it and then tell me what you think...
There's just something about Holiday Specials/Movies/Cartoons that captures my imagination. I love watching them. Especially White Christmas. Which one is your favorite?
CATHY
Some things, it seems, are even more expensive than gas. Have you ever tried buying liquid paper by the gallon?
THE COUNTDOWN CONTINUES
Only 9 days left until Narnia!
Here's a funny quote from the trailer -
Lucy: [holding out her hand to Mr. Tumnus] Oh, you shake it.
Mr. Tumnus: Why?
Lucy: I don't know.
Here's a funny quote from the trailer -
Lucy: [holding out her hand to Mr. Tumnus] Oh, you shake it.
Mr. Tumnus: Why?
Lucy: I don't know.
WHAT'S IN A NAME?
Have you ever been curious about what your name means? There are lots of great baby name websites, but I recommend a book by Dorothy Astoria called The Name Book. Besides meanings and origins, it includes the spiritual significance of the over 10,000 names listed inside its covers. I don't own it, but a friend of mine used in back in jr. high to tell me what my name really meant.
Thinking about names, I decided to look up my family's monikers and I found an interesting theme: royalty. Our family name can have two meanings: abbreviated it means "Queen" or in its full form it means "Promise Keeper" (faithful in keeping promises). I like both of these meanings, since "Queen" reminds me that we are part of the Bride of Christ. I like "promise keeper" for obvious reasons.
Dad and my nearest brother share the same name. It means, "Highborn, resolute protector." It suits them both perfectly.
Mom's name means, "Gracious, God is my Oath." It suits her, too.
The twins' names mean, "Bold, God is my Judge" and "Truthful, Wears a Crown." Those are perfect for them.
My sister's name means "Princess, Crowned with Laurels."
My name is the longest. It means, "Like God, Nobleman, Gift of God." I almost got the name Bejamin. It means, "Son of My Right Hand" or "Son of Blessing." It would have been OK if they'd tacked that one on the end.
The part of my name I like best is my middle name, the name I go by: Patrick. Astoria's book goes beyond the Latin meaning, "Nobleman." She explained that the name implies obedience to the king. The obedience is not given out of duty or fear. It's the best kind of obedience, given because of love for the one in authority and family ties to him. I am obedient to the king because I'm his loving son. Cool, huh?
Whenever I'm having an identity crises, I just think about my name and remind myself that I am, "like God, a nobleman, an obedient loving son of the King, a gift of God, the son of His Right Hand, the child of His Blessing, faithful to keep His Word, the Royal Bride of Christ."
If you don't know the story and meaning behind your name, then what are you waiting for?
Thinking about names, I decided to look up my family's monikers and I found an interesting theme: royalty. Our family name can have two meanings: abbreviated it means "Queen" or in its full form it means "Promise Keeper" (faithful in keeping promises). I like both of these meanings, since "Queen" reminds me that we are part of the Bride of Christ. I like "promise keeper" for obvious reasons.
Dad and my nearest brother share the same name. It means, "Highborn, resolute protector." It suits them both perfectly.
Mom's name means, "Gracious, God is my Oath." It suits her, too.
The twins' names mean, "Bold, God is my Judge" and "Truthful, Wears a Crown." Those are perfect for them.
My sister's name means "Princess, Crowned with Laurels."
My name is the longest. It means, "Like God, Nobleman, Gift of God." I almost got the name Bejamin. It means, "Son of My Right Hand" or "Son of Blessing." It would have been OK if they'd tacked that one on the end.
The part of my name I like best is my middle name, the name I go by: Patrick. Astoria's book goes beyond the Latin meaning, "Nobleman." She explained that the name implies obedience to the king. The obedience is not given out of duty or fear. It's the best kind of obedience, given because of love for the one in authority and family ties to him. I am obedient to the king because I'm his loving son. Cool, huh?
Whenever I'm having an identity crises, I just think about my name and remind myself that I am, "like God, a nobleman, an obedient loving son of the King, a gift of God, the son of His Right Hand, the child of His Blessing, faithful to keep His Word, the Royal Bride of Christ."
If you don't know the story and meaning behind your name, then what are you waiting for?
BRIAN HEAD WELCH
I just read this archived USA Today article from last March about Brian Head Welch getting baptised in Isreal. For those of you who don't know, he's Korn's former lead guitarist. For those of you who do know, I've got a question for you. What's he up to now? Has he released his Christian album yet?
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
MORE THAN ONE WAY TO BE AN ARCHITECT
If you are one of my secret readers (the ones who never leave comments, but I know you are there - Hi.) then you will know that I sold my Legos on eBay. Well, I am totally shocked at the prices they commanded. The town I made had only 7 houses and ended at $100.00 plus shipping and handling! I got emails from all sorts of parents and collectors from all over the US and even Europe who complimented the buildings and wanted to know if I plan on selling more...wouldn't that be an awesome way to make extra money? Maybe while I'm in Germany I'll find some cheap legos and can do this again. Could be fun.
Monday, November 28, 2005
THE SEVENTH SEAL
FIRST LINE
Everybody has their death dance
Their Thriller at the jr high prom
We are all united in the steps and melody
And the frescoes the woodcuts
The words writen here
Can not express the power of the melody
That commands us to perfom
To dance
The Danse Macabre
Everybody has their death dance
Their Thriller at the jr high prom
We are all united in the steps and melody
And the frescoes the woodcuts
The words writen here
Can not express the power of the melody
That commands us to perfom
To dance
The Danse Macabre
Sunday, November 27, 2005
NO SURPRISE. BUT WHERE'S MARY JANE?
Hey, the "Which Superhero Are You?" quiz I just took says I'm Spiderman. I'd post the pic but it's taking up too much room and looks a little tacky.
In my own defense, it only takes a few minutes to take these quizes, and I need a break from selling. B4 you label me a couch potato who wastes too much time on online quizes, take one yourself. They are a nice momentary distraction.
In my own defense, it only takes a few minutes to take these quizes, and I need a break from selling. B4 you label me a couch potato who wastes too much time on online quizes, take one yourself. They are a nice momentary distraction.
A NERD BY ANY OTHER NAME
One of my friends always introduces me as, "the coolest nerd you'll ever meet."
Not one to be pigeonholed so easily, I decided to test his label online by taking this QUIZ.
And the results are in: The test reads "Pure Nerd."
The site elaborated, "For The Record: A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia. A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one. A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/ interactions. You scored better than half Nerd (82%), earning you the title of: Pure Nerd."
And went on to say, "The times, they are a-changing. It used to be that being exceptionally smart led to being unpopular, which would ultimately lead to picking up all of the traits and tendences associated with the "dork." No-longer. Being smart isn't as socially crippling as it once was, and even more so as you get older: eventually being a Pure Nerd will likely be replaced with the following label: Purely Successful. Congratulations!"
Go ahead and take the test for yourself. I dare you.
Not one to be pigeonholed so easily, I decided to test his label online by taking this QUIZ.
And the results are in: The test reads "Pure Nerd."
The site elaborated, "For The Record: A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia. A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one. A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/ interactions. You scored better than half Nerd (82%), earning you the title of: Pure Nerd."
And went on to say, "The times, they are a-changing. It used to be that being exceptionally smart led to being unpopular, which would ultimately lead to picking up all of the traits and tendences associated with the "dork." No-longer. Being smart isn't as socially crippling as it once was, and even more so as you get older: eventually being a Pure Nerd will likely be replaced with the following label: Purely Successful. Congratulations!"
Go ahead and take the test for yourself. I dare you.
GOOGLE GAME
first line
stare blankly at the wall
divide your argument
play the seashell game
the spatula
how would you know
a hummingbird's guide to
daria
the date rolls around again
typical days
prayers
while rebooting
message like a fish
getting started
honorable mention
fiction
noise abatement
film
going mobile
solar charged
headcheese
drug thing
infiltration
evolution
if you stare at someone long enough
sports machine
cup of lukewarm
chapter two
people who suffer
madhouse
stupid questions
sampler
I'm still going
everything
alone at last
he screams on the floor
the evidence
elephant
chemical
search
stare blankly at the wall
divide your argument
play the seashell game
the spatula
how would you know
a hummingbird's guide to
daria
the date rolls around again
typical days
prayers
while rebooting
message like a fish
getting started
honorable mention
fiction
noise abatement
film
going mobile
solar charged
headcheese
drug thing
infiltration
evolution
if you stare at someone long enough
sports machine
cup of lukewarm
chapter two
people who suffer
madhouse
stupid questions
sampler
I'm still going
everything
alone at last
he screams on the floor
the evidence
elephant
chemical
search
FRAGMENT WITHOUT A FIGHT
We all know the type.
. He only took what she wanted.
. Stealing everything
. He never said, "I'm sorry."
. Just, "I'm sorry for you."
. And he believed it.
. And she questioned herself.
. He only took what she wanted.
. Stealing everything
. He never said, "I'm sorry."
. Just, "I'm sorry for you."
. And he believed it.
. And she questioned herself.
REQUIRED READING RESOLUTION
Here's an early New Year's promise to myself. Besides finishing Gordon MacDonald's Ordering Your Private World, I'm making two additions to my must read/finish reading list:
Richard Florida’s The Rise of the Creative Class
Corrine Maier's Bonjour Laziness : Jumping Off the Corporate Ladder
Richard Florida’s The Rise of the Creative Class
Corrine Maier's Bonjour Laziness : Jumping Off the Corporate Ladder
AT THREE
I put on my little boots
. And my feet take on a life of their own
. Im not one
. But three
. And We
. Can go anywhere
. Step over anything
. And my feet take on a life of their own
. Im not one
. But three
. And We
. Can go anywhere
. Step over anything
WORKING FOR PEANUTS
aaahhh!!! I have, like, a kazillion eBay auctions closing, and I have to get all this stuff boxed up and shipped. I need more packing peanuts!
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
HAPPY THANKSGIVING
What are your plans for Turkey Day? In about 7 hours I'll pull myself out of bed and drive to my brother's house to spend the day visiting with his family.
Hope your day is filled with food, family, and fun. What great things to be thankful for!
Hope your day is filled with food, family, and fun. What great things to be thankful for!
Monday, November 21, 2005
EBAY
I'm doing pretty well on my eBay auctions. I'm almost to 20 listings. It is so hard selling what I own, especially when I know I'm selling at a loss, but it will be worth it when I'm debt free! The process is gradually getting easier with each listing. When it's over, I should be able to carry everything I own in a few suitcases. I wonder what it will feel like to own nothing but clothes?
Sunday, November 20, 2005
THANK YOU!
I like to practice my writing with trivial stuff that I find amusing or annoying or whatever, so I don't normally directly address my spiritual life in this blog, but I've got to do it today.
Church hit me right between the eyes. I knew I had it coming, but in both services it was like the sermons were spoken right to me. Even the Sunday School lesson was a bullseye.
The main thing I came away with was this life lesson: I've got to admit that I'm depressed before Jesus can help me recover from it. I've been spending all my energy denying the problem instead of just owning up to it and asking God for help. So, here's my real first step: Help, God!
Here was another thing I need to write down before I forget it. Men tend to look to their careers to define their self image, and when work goes bad or stops, men are more vulnerable to depression and temptation. That's normal. Another one that I'll file away for later: women tend to look to their relationship with their partner rather than work. So they tend to get depressed and tempted when they perceive the relationship as having problems, or when they are between relationships. I don't know if that's true or not, but the work thing is for me.
But I don't want it to be! I don't want to be defined by a job, good or bad. I want to be defined by God's design and plan for me as his creation and the object of his affection. And I want to be stable emotionally no matter what my work circumstances are. Like Paul and Silas, I want to sing out from the jail cell! So I'm going to rally my faith and fight this thing like my life depends on it. I'm going to focus on Jesus and not my circumstances, and (it's Thanksgiving for cryin' out loud so this part should be easy) praise God with a thankful heart for his blessings, most of all his gift of Jesus, who, by the way, has stuck with me like glue through this whole ordeal!
Church hit me right between the eyes. I knew I had it coming, but in both services it was like the sermons were spoken right to me. Even the Sunday School lesson was a bullseye.
The main thing I came away with was this life lesson: I've got to admit that I'm depressed before Jesus can help me recover from it. I've been spending all my energy denying the problem instead of just owning up to it and asking God for help. So, here's my real first step: Help, God!
Here was another thing I need to write down before I forget it. Men tend to look to their careers to define their self image, and when work goes bad or stops, men are more vulnerable to depression and temptation. That's normal. Another one that I'll file away for later: women tend to look to their relationship with their partner rather than work. So they tend to get depressed and tempted when they perceive the relationship as having problems, or when they are between relationships. I don't know if that's true or not, but the work thing is for me.
But I don't want it to be! I don't want to be defined by a job, good or bad. I want to be defined by God's design and plan for me as his creation and the object of his affection. And I want to be stable emotionally no matter what my work circumstances are. Like Paul and Silas, I want to sing out from the jail cell! So I'm going to rally my faith and fight this thing like my life depends on it. I'm going to focus on Jesus and not my circumstances, and (it's Thanksgiving for cryin' out loud so this part should be easy) praise God with a thankful heart for his blessings, most of all his gift of Jesus, who, by the way, has stuck with me like glue through this whole ordeal!
Saturday, November 19, 2005
PERSONIFICATION
I feel like a triumphant Constantine entering Rome. The hideous wallpaper border in Keri's apartment is finally down. And all it took was two days of elbow grease and two kinds of stripping solution. When a friend suggested painting over the stubborn eyesore, I balked AND scoffed. Surrender was not an option. I would win this one: defeat the enemy at all costs.
Ever find that a simple possession, an inanimate object, can seem to take on human characteristics when it stands in your way? Well, I put this one to bed and tucked it in. At least one of my life's battles is won.
Ever find that a simple possession, an inanimate object, can seem to take on human characteristics when it stands in your way? Well, I put this one to bed and tucked it in. At least one of my life's battles is won.
Friday, November 18, 2005
NEWSWORTHY
Since I have no permanent address right now, my parents are getting my subscription to USA today. I've been missing getting a daily paper, feeling isolated, but I just realized that I can get the newspaper online, sort of - even the comics. Check out this link.
REALITY CHECK
I don't recognize myself. Where did my tan go? Where did these funky glasses come from, and where did I put my contacts? I can't remember the last time I tucked in my shirt. My belts are still in the suitcase. And when was my last haircut? I'm sitting here on a Friday night barefoot in my 3-year-old Gap t shirt and worn out AE shorts, (OK, they were worn out when I bought them) sporting a four-day beard. Working on eBay, I glanced over and saw a Tommy ad on TV with lots of well-dressed college-age kids looking happy & fulfilled. Being here in Ruston, a college town if there ever was one, is reminding me of what it was like to be in school full time - spending an hour on my hair every morning to get the curls just right or buying new clothes for that party on the weekend. I think about those days, a time when my biggest worry was which shirt I was going to wear. I had a wardrobe that probably cost what I make now in a year. I'd like to go back in time and visit those days.....and smack myself into reality. Isn't growing up fun?
I don't think any of my friends would label me socially retarded, but I'm questioning myself. Have you heard Jamie Cullum's song "Twentysomething"? How can I be a 30 year-old twentysomething?
I don't think any of my friends would label me socially retarded, but I'm questioning myself. Have you heard Jamie Cullum's song "Twentysomething"? How can I be a 30 year-old twentysomething?
GOOD GRADES
My nephew finished his finals. He earned a 4.0 this quarter. I'm a proud uncle. Ben's GPA made me think about getting report cards in college and high school. I always earned A's, but in the end, the grades didn't mean that much to me. They didn't seem to be accurate measures of my level of learning in the different classes. It's strange to think about being graded again, but I'll experience this phenomenon just the same when I return to school in the Fall. Were (are) grades important to you? What would be a better alternative?
Thursday, November 17, 2005
SINGING THE WALLPAPER BLUES FOR MY SUPPER
I went over to my my brother's wonderful girlfriend's house for supper tonight. She didn't make me sing for it, exactly, but my arms sure are sore. The wallpaper border in her bathroom doesn't match the look she's going for in there, so she asked me to help her strip it. I scored it, and coated it in this wallpaper remover stuff. And being a person who follows directions, I waited a half hour. Then I started to scrape it, but LO AND BEHOLD the previous tenant (it's a rental) used paste that was not water soluble. (NOOOOOO! Why God? WHY?) So I called it a day,and we decided to use something stronger later. Instead, we sat down and I showed her how to use eBay. Why on Earth would somebody apply non-strippable wallpaper in a rental?
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
STORY STARTER
Thinking about my parent's toys got me thinking about a story idea. I sketched out the idea below. It's totally fictional, sort of a compilation of vague memories of family stories. What do you think? Be gentle. Remember, this is an undedited incomplete rough draft.
Betty Anne lay quietly in bed thinking about the day stretched out before her. She wiggled her toes under the covers. 5:30: No use getting up now. Mother would just make her get back in bed. She stuck out her nose from under the covers, and, feeling an uncomfortable chill, darted it back under. Too cold to get up and get dressed, anyway. She thought about the scene that was waiting in the living room: the stocking from Santa with the new pencils, the walnuts, and of course, the orange in the toe. Maybe a new book would be in there, too. She would know soon enough, she consoled herself. After their stockings, the family would take turns opening gifts. Her turn to unwrap would be after her mother, but before her brothers. "Ladies first," she could hear her father saying. She imagined the boys' irritated expressions when they were forced to put their gifts back under the tree. She wondered who was more patient, her brothers in waiting to open their gifts, or her father, in training the boys to have good manners. She must try to be patient, too. But the anticipation was killing her. What gift had her parents bought her this year? Betty had dropped hints about the star-shaped silver charm for her bracelet. How could Mother and Dad not have heard her remarking last month to her cousin how much she'd like it, how wonderful it would look next to the two other charms dangling from her wrist. If their gift wasn't the charm, then she had no idea what it would be. She had already started writing a thank you note to Aunt Grace and Uncle Leo for their card with a silver dollar in it. Their gift was the same every year. From ther grandmother she'd get either handkerchiefs or underwear. The boys would give her something they'd made together from scrap wood. Though she'd been very careful when making their gifts, they had not turned out as nicely as mother's potholders. She'd tried to make desk sets for her brothers and her father, but the glue on the decoupaged pen cans had stayed tacky, and she was afraid that the tissue paper she'd wrapped them in would stick. Oh, well. She'd done her best, and after all, "it's the thought that counts." Betty glanced at the clock: 5:50. Right on cue, she heard her mother making noise in the kitchen. "In 10 minutes," Betty thought, "I'll get up and help her. Well, I certainly am in the Christmas Spirit." Most mornings, because she had to bathe and dress for school, Betty was excused from helping prepare breakfast. Mother insisted that the family eat their regular meal together in the dining room before "going anywhere near those stockings or tree." Then, Dad would have Bob read the family the Christmas story. And finally, they would go into the living room and see the tree. She wondered how Mother could get up so early after staying up so late putting up the decorations. Reluctantly pulling back the covers Betty thought, "I guess I'll get up now to help her."
Betty Anne lay quietly in bed thinking about the day stretched out before her. She wiggled her toes under the covers. 5:30: No use getting up now. Mother would just make her get back in bed. She stuck out her nose from under the covers, and, feeling an uncomfortable chill, darted it back under. Too cold to get up and get dressed, anyway. She thought about the scene that was waiting in the living room: the stocking from Santa with the new pencils, the walnuts, and of course, the orange in the toe. Maybe a new book would be in there, too. She would know soon enough, she consoled herself. After their stockings, the family would take turns opening gifts. Her turn to unwrap would be after her mother, but before her brothers. "Ladies first," she could hear her father saying. She imagined the boys' irritated expressions when they were forced to put their gifts back under the tree. She wondered who was more patient, her brothers in waiting to open their gifts, or her father, in training the boys to have good manners. She must try to be patient, too. But the anticipation was killing her. What gift had her parents bought her this year? Betty had dropped hints about the star-shaped silver charm for her bracelet. How could Mother and Dad not have heard her remarking last month to her cousin how much she'd like it, how wonderful it would look next to the two other charms dangling from her wrist. If their gift wasn't the charm, then she had no idea what it would be. She had already started writing a thank you note to Aunt Grace and Uncle Leo for their card with a silver dollar in it. Their gift was the same every year. From ther grandmother she'd get either handkerchiefs or underwear. The boys would give her something they'd made together from scrap wood. Though she'd been very careful when making their gifts, they had not turned out as nicely as mother's potholders. She'd tried to make desk sets for her brothers and her father, but the glue on the decoupaged pen cans had stayed tacky, and she was afraid that the tissue paper she'd wrapped them in would stick. Oh, well. She'd done her best, and after all, "it's the thought that counts." Betty glanced at the clock: 5:50. Right on cue, she heard her mother making noise in the kitchen. "In 10 minutes," Betty thought, "I'll get up and help her. Well, I certainly am in the Christmas Spirit." Most mornings, because she had to bathe and dress for school, Betty was excused from helping prepare breakfast. Mother insisted that the family eat their regular meal together in the dining room before "going anywhere near those stockings or tree." Then, Dad would have Bob read the family the Christmas story. And finally, they would go into the living room and see the tree. She wondered how Mother could get up so early after staying up so late putting up the decorations. Reluctantly pulling back the covers Betty thought, "I guess I'll get up now to help her."
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
TOYS
So, like I said yesterday, I'm playing with little plastic toys (I know, I'm a loser.) all day. And I started thinking about the toys my parent's, both in their 70's now, played with when they were children. They kept a few of them, and I've heard stories about the others. There are some big differences between their playthings and the things filling today's toyboxes. Firstly, they didn't have many toys, and they had to use their imaginations alot. Mom's favorite toys were spools, matchboxes, and a dollhouse made from an orange crate. Dad, being a city kid, was a little more sophisticated. He had cast iron cars and celluloid horses. Mom had a couple of celludoid dolls. And they had their books, and that was pretty much it. But they have more fond memories of their simple toys than I think today's children will have of their trendy gadgets. Maybe I'm just being sentimental, but I don't think so. Growing up in the Great Depression, I think the folks understood that buying a toy was a great sacrifice for their parents. Mom said that her mother used to pinch a penny until it cried 'uncle.' But their childhood wasn't overshadowed by what today's standards might label poverty. They both got up Christmas mornings overjoyed because they'd have walnuts and oranges in their stockings - rarities in their households. I have a hard time grasping how much their world has changed since they were children. I mean, they grew up in a world before plastic. Think about it: cast-iron trucks! Can you imagine it? I wonder what kids will play with when I'm 70.
Monday, November 14, 2005
LEGO
I'm selling my Lego collection to make some extra cash; I'm right in the middle of sorting & inventory...snore... And I decided that they would probably sell better put together instead of in zip lock bags. I can't just put them together the way they came from the factory because I bought them used and at different times, making any potential sets missing so many parts that it's hopeless. I checked out the prices of some "custom models" on eBay. After seeing the prices on them, I think I should choose "Master Lego Architect & Builder" as my new career. Hmmmm.... I think most of the serious Legofiles must avoid eBay for their buying/selling. I found a site called Bricklink that looks like it's their secret love nest. Seriously, I always thought it would be cool to be one of those guys who worked at Legoland doing nothing but making Painted Lady Victorians or Statues of Liberty from little plastic bricks. I never thought about freelancing it, but that just what Burik Models and Lions Gate do, and I'll bet a lot more, those are just the first 2 that turned up when I googled "custom lego models." Well, I guess I'll go to bed now and dream of mini figures and models. If you could build anything from Legos, what would you pick?
Sunday, November 13, 2005
NEW BOOK
I just started reading Gordon MacDonald's new update of Ordering Your Private World. Heard of it? If you've read it, tell me what you think.
Here's a quote from the jacket:
"As a young, ambitious pastor, Gordon MacDonald was off to a fast start in a sizable congregation. A naturally gifted leader with a full schedule, he was a man of influence in his church and community. Pastor MacDonald was driven in his ambition to serve God and His people. Until the day he 'hit the wall' . . . . Driven people often project a bravado of confidence as they forge ahead with their acheivement-oriented life plan."
Here's a quote from the jacket:
"As a young, ambitious pastor, Gordon MacDonald was off to a fast start in a sizable congregation. A naturally gifted leader with a full schedule, he was a man of influence in his church and community. Pastor MacDonald was driven in his ambition to serve God and His people. Until the day he 'hit the wall' . . . . Driven people often project a bravado of confidence as they forge ahead with their acheivement-oriented life plan."
WELCOME HOME
I'm totally enjoying being with my nephew this month. He is hilarious. I am so glad that we share the same sense of humor; while he's kicked back on the couch, I can just lean back in the recliner and listen, laughing until my sides ache. Losing touch with my extended family these last couple of years, I didn't know what I'd been missing.
PASSION OF THE MOMENT: YANKEE PUMPKIN PIE
From time to time I develop a crush that I've got to share. This week's is Yankee Candle Company's Pumpkin Pie Housewarmer. It's flickering next to me, lighting up the room with all the comforts of Grandma's kitchen on Thanksgiving morning & Christmas eve combined. What's your favorite Yankee Candle?
Saturday, November 12, 2005
"I NEED TO HAVE A GOAL"
Wow. I just read another of Jim's entries in his blog, and again I'm going to copy and paste it here so I can easily reread it a few more times. This quote sounds like a strange hybrid of something I'd say at 20 and how I'm starting to feel at 30:
"It's crazy how right when you think you have life figured out, you end up confused again shortly thereafter (usually worse than before). That's how it's been here lately. I've been going to school for 3-4 months now, but it looks like if I continue according to their plan...I'll just end up some boring businessman - I'd honestly almost rather die. I know that living for that would kill me in the heart. I need to do my own thing. I'm not going to live life everyday doing something that doesn't make a difference...and come on...redesigning sites for some guy's company to make him more profit really doesn't matter...at all...in the slightest bit...What would be my dream job...? If I could pick anything it would be a photographer that does stuff like they do in National Geographic or something. I'd love to travel all over the world, go to remote villages or mountains or jungles and just take pictures. I've been told a couple times I should be a photojournalist... There is a great need for that in the Christian community. Someone to inform people on what is going on. Maybe I could find some way to combine web design, photography and writing. I like doing all three...I need to have a goal...some way to use these three things soon...hmmm..."
"It's crazy how right when you think you have life figured out, you end up confused again shortly thereafter (usually worse than before). That's how it's been here lately. I've been going to school for 3-4 months now, but it looks like if I continue according to their plan...I'll just end up some boring businessman - I'd honestly almost rather die. I know that living for that would kill me in the heart. I need to do my own thing. I'm not going to live life everyday doing something that doesn't make a difference...and come on...redesigning sites for some guy's company to make him more profit really doesn't matter...at all...in the slightest bit...What would be my dream job...? If I could pick anything it would be a photographer that does stuff like they do in National Geographic or something. I'd love to travel all over the world, go to remote villages or mountains or jungles and just take pictures. I've been told a couple times I should be a photojournalist... There is a great need for that in the Christian community. Someone to inform people on what is going on. Maybe I could find some way to combine web design, photography and writing. I like doing all three...I need to have a goal...some way to use these three things soon...hmmm..."
RESTORATION
I just found a blog entry written by a guy named Jim that I totally identified with. He explained a concept that I struggled in vain to explain to one of my matches on eHarmony. She asked me what my goal for my life was. I told her I wanted to be the man God made me to be. Here's what Jim had to say:
"I don't want to kill it. I want to be who God made me to be. I have to admit, right now, I'm quite far from being that person. The real me just sits in hiding, afraid to come out. This isn't good at all. God has put things in me that other people need, but instead...I'm distant, detached, and afraid to love the people that God has put in my life. 'You're such a jerk' Satan chimes in, 'That person needed encouragement, but once again you failed to give it - That person needed you to love them, but you were too afraid...as usual.' Good thing I serve a God who is going to finish His work in me. Jesus came to 'bind up the brokenhearted, [and] proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound' Isaiah 61:1 KJV. My heart is His now. There is nothing that He can't fix and there is no situation that is hopeless with Him. He is restoring my heart everyday."
I guess that's my goal. I want to be restored.
I think I've figured out what attracted me to the stories of those three characters from the past. They weren't too afraid to care.
"I don't want to kill it. I want to be who God made me to be. I have to admit, right now, I'm quite far from being that person. The real me just sits in hiding, afraid to come out. This isn't good at all. God has put things in me that other people need, but instead...I'm distant, detached, and afraid to love the people that God has put in my life. 'You're such a jerk' Satan chimes in, 'That person needed encouragement, but once again you failed to give it - That person needed you to love them, but you were too afraid...as usual.' Good thing I serve a God who is going to finish His work in me. Jesus came to 'bind up the brokenhearted, [and] proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound' Isaiah 61:1 KJV. My heart is His now. There is nothing that He can't fix and there is no situation that is hopeless with Him. He is restoring my heart everyday."
I guess that's my goal. I want to be restored.
I think I've figured out what attracted me to the stories of those three characters from the past. They weren't too afraid to care.
HEROES
It's 2:42 on a Saturday morning, and here's what I'm thinking about. The three books from my childhood that had the greatest impact were The Cross and the Switchblade by David Wilkerson, The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boon, and The Biography of Jane Addams, the founder of Hull House in Chicago. It was the personal connection that I felt with the main characters that made these books special to me. I identified with them in a way that I'm trying to piece together this morning. What was it about them that made me connect with them? I loved them, of course. Who wouldn't? All three were heroes, but I read a lot of stories about heroes. Not all of them were special to me - just these three. Why are they in my mind now?
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
OKLAHOMA!
Kari took me to see Oklahoma! in Monroe tonight. Reading the casts' biographies made me want to go into full time theater, but then I thought, "Wait a minute! Weren't you planning to change to a career that would make you MORE money?!?"
Speaking of actors, I'm hoping to travel back at the end of the month to see Ryan and Amanda when Ryan's students put on their show. (Mental note to double check the dates). I found out he just auditioned for a commercial. I can totally see him becoming famous.
Speaking of actors, I'm hoping to travel back at the end of the month to see Ryan and Amanda when Ryan's students put on their show. (Mental note to double check the dates). I found out he just auditioned for a commercial. I can totally see him becoming famous.
Saturday, November 05, 2005
PREMATURE
I had myself totally convinced that I was OK about Katrina. No more grieving, just moving on. "I'm finished with this whole grief thing; I'm just excited about the possibilities." I can't believe I even thought that, much less spoke it to a friend.
So, I went to Gulfport and had breakfast with Ryan and his girlfriend Amanda this morning. And then I visited Chris and Wendy. And then I left and went home, forsaking the rest of the day's plan. I just couldn't handle being in Gulfport anymore. I needed to get out of there, for sanity's sake. My thoughts wouldn't stop racing. My heart wouldn't stop hurting.
I'm just not ready yet.
So, I went to Gulfport and had breakfast with Ryan and his girlfriend Amanda this morning. And then I visited Chris and Wendy. And then I left and went home, forsaking the rest of the day's plan. I just couldn't handle being in Gulfport anymore. I needed to get out of there, for sanity's sake. My thoughts wouldn't stop racing. My heart wouldn't stop hurting.
I'm just not ready yet.
Friday, November 04, 2005
RUBBER SHOES
While visiting a big city, I went into a discount store's shoe department and asked the clerk where I could find a pair of rubber shoes. She smiled and led me directly to...the galoshes! I was surprised and amused, since (and you true country Southern boys and girls who are reading this will know this already) I was requesting the location of their selection of flip flops. I didn't bother to explain the clerk's mistake to her, but I thought you might enjoy the joke. I surely did.
ELEVEN BUCKS AT KINKO'S
$11.oo spent at Kinkos...lots of eHarmony communications...3 downloads from iTunes...finally getting to the blog...can't wait to get home internet access again!
eHarmony has been like being at a dinner party/mingler with lots of cute girls, so I'm, of course, enjoying it. But having dated so few women, I feel so inexperienced and not at all dating savvy. Some of the women I'm talking to seem a lot more experienced with this than I feel. Isn't learning fun?
With some encouragement from friends (you know who you are) I have decided to take that month-long trip to Germany this Christmas. It will actually be a little over a month to avoid the price increase in tickets. Spending time with my brother and his family is exactly what I need right now. It will give me the time to get my brain back in order, and they are exactly the next ones I need to be around when I need to be grounded in who I am in relation to my faith and family (after being with family on American soil).
I'm on a leg of my life's journey that I never anticipated, but I'm past the grief for the most part (though having everything I own crammed into crates in my parent's living room is something I could live without right now) and moving into the excitement of all the possibilities that starting over in this way allows.
I'm headed to the Coast tomorrow for the first time since moving out what I salvaged after the storm. Time to tie up some loose ends and say some better goodbyes to three of my friends. Breakfast with the first, lunch with the second and dinner with the third. Sounds delicious, ha ha.
I'm going to a play with my brother's girlfriend this upcoming Tuesday. I'm filling in since he's back on duty with the LA national gaurd. Having him on a two week break has been great, and the whole family hated to see him go back, but duty calls, you know? I'll still be staying at his place the month of November before I leave for Europe, keeping his girlfriend and son company. I'm hoping to make a couple weekend trips to see my bro's family in Arkansas - camping - yipee!
eHarmony has been like being at a dinner party/mingler with lots of cute girls, so I'm, of course, enjoying it. But having dated so few women, I feel so inexperienced and not at all dating savvy. Some of the women I'm talking to seem a lot more experienced with this than I feel. Isn't learning fun?
With some encouragement from friends (you know who you are) I have decided to take that month-long trip to Germany this Christmas. It will actually be a little over a month to avoid the price increase in tickets. Spending time with my brother and his family is exactly what I need right now. It will give me the time to get my brain back in order, and they are exactly the next ones I need to be around when I need to be grounded in who I am in relation to my faith and family (after being with family on American soil).
I'm on a leg of my life's journey that I never anticipated, but I'm past the grief for the most part (though having everything I own crammed into crates in my parent's living room is something I could live without right now) and moving into the excitement of all the possibilities that starting over in this way allows.
I'm headed to the Coast tomorrow for the first time since moving out what I salvaged after the storm. Time to tie up some loose ends and say some better goodbyes to three of my friends. Breakfast with the first, lunch with the second and dinner with the third. Sounds delicious, ha ha.
I'm going to a play with my brother's girlfriend this upcoming Tuesday. I'm filling in since he's back on duty with the LA national gaurd. Having him on a two week break has been great, and the whole family hated to see him go back, but duty calls, you know? I'll still be staying at his place the month of November before I leave for Europe, keeping his girlfriend and son company. I'm hoping to make a couple weekend trips to see my bro's family in Arkansas - camping - yipee!
Thursday, November 03, 2005
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
MRYTLE BEACH
One week in Mrytle Beach is long enough to lose track of what day it is... Ahhhhhhhh, relaxing.
Thursday, October 27, 2005
GERMANY FOR CHRISTMAS
Since I'm taking a break from work, I'm totally enjoying seeing my family again. (I keep expecting somebody to hand me a Christmas gift, though, since that's usually the season that brings all of us together under one roof).
Speaking of Christmas, I talked to my brother Dan tonight about the possibility of nabbing a cheap (ha ha) ticket to Germany and spending a couple three weeks sharing their fa la la's, ho ho ho's and the like.
What do you think? Should I go to Germany? Maybe I'll never come back... It could happen. What would Mom and Dad think about me moving to Germany (or to Japan to teach English at a university) the same year that Dan moves back home to Mississippi?
Speaking of Christmas, I talked to my brother Dan tonight about the possibility of nabbing a cheap (ha ha) ticket to Germany and spending a couple three weeks sharing their fa la la's, ho ho ho's and the like.
What do you think? Should I go to Germany? Maybe I'll never come back... It could happen. What would Mom and Dad think about me moving to Germany (or to Japan to teach English at a university) the same year that Dan moves back home to Mississippi?
SO THIS EHARMONY THING...
So this eHarmony thing is interesting, but it takes up a lot of my computer time, so I've not been posting regularly. But back to the grindstone...
I went camping a couple weekends ago north of Birmingham. I called Terry on Friday, and he & a group of friends were driving up there to hike & camp. I was driving up to my sisters' in the city anyway, so I borrowed a sleeping bag and jacket and drove north to join them.
Hiking in the mountains, enjoying the campfire and the views, the whole time I couldn't stop thinking about God and how much he deserves our praise. I needed that realization that weekend in particular; I was getting a little mopey, but I'm cured now.
I went camping a couple weekends ago north of Birmingham. I called Terry on Friday, and he & a group of friends were driving up there to hike & camp. I was driving up to my sisters' in the city anyway, so I borrowed a sleeping bag and jacket and drove north to join them.
Hiking in the mountains, enjoying the campfire and the views, the whole time I couldn't stop thinking about God and how much he deserves our praise. I needed that realization that weekend in particular; I was getting a little mopey, but I'm cured now.
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
NUMBER, PLEASE
My brother in law got a phone message late tonight. He was going to bed at 10 without returning the call. My sister fussed at him, insisting he call back because, "the man is waiting on you to call him back!"
Wow! I'm glad she doesn't know my dirty little secret. Apparently, I'm the world's worst at returning phone calls. Evidence? I've got, like, 15 missed calls/voice messages/text messages that have built up the last couple of weeks that I've yet to return. 'I've been busy' sounds like a totally lame-o excuse, since I'm not working yet. I mean, I guess I have been pretty involved with getting re-acquainted with my sister's family and helping around the house. Three small kids in one house are enough to make you forget that you have a phone, I'm finding out. But I'm thinking the real reason I've procrastinated is that I'm not ready to talk with my acquaintances about my feelings about the hurricane, and I suspect everyone is going to try to make me talk about it before I'm ready. I'm more of a wimp than I thought... I need to call them tomorrow. They probably will understand if I explain that I don't want to talk about it right now.
How long was the longest time you ever took to return a phone call? Come on, beat my record if you can!
Wow! I'm glad she doesn't know my dirty little secret. Apparently, I'm the world's worst at returning phone calls. Evidence? I've got, like, 15 missed calls/voice messages/text messages that have built up the last couple of weeks that I've yet to return. 'I've been busy' sounds like a totally lame-o excuse, since I'm not working yet. I mean, I guess I have been pretty involved with getting re-acquainted with my sister's family and helping around the house. Three small kids in one house are enough to make you forget that you have a phone, I'm finding out. But I'm thinking the real reason I've procrastinated is that I'm not ready to talk with my acquaintances about my feelings about the hurricane, and I suspect everyone is going to try to make me talk about it before I'm ready. I'm more of a wimp than I thought... I need to call them tomorrow. They probably will understand if I explain that I don't want to talk about it right now.
How long was the longest time you ever took to return a phone call? Come on, beat my record if you can!
Sunday, October 02, 2005
COMFORT FOOD?
So, I'm sitting in the wing chair working on pictures on Snapfish when the phone rings, and its Sarah: "We're in the driveway. Throw on some clothes so we can go to dinner at Cracker Barrel." And I seriously dressed so fast I hurt myself. Literally...I smashed my toe, and it bled. Yikes.
But dinner was nice. Nothing like Sunday night breakfast dinner. Mmmm. I've eaten so much while I've been in Birmingham - too many cookies and not enough veggies. I think that comfort food is making me feel less comfortable. While dressing for dinner I realized that I've gained a few pounds since the Hurricane. In that regard, I'm looking forward to being in Ruston where I'll be back on my regular running schudule and back to my normal diet. Goodbye comfort food. Hello being comfortable in my clothing.
So, if you are in a stressful situation, I've got 4 words for you: Don't eat too much.
That's all for tonight. Thank you.
But dinner was nice. Nothing like Sunday night breakfast dinner. Mmmm. I've eaten so much while I've been in Birmingham - too many cookies and not enough veggies. I think that comfort food is making me feel less comfortable. While dressing for dinner I realized that I've gained a few pounds since the Hurricane. In that regard, I'm looking forward to being in Ruston where I'll be back on my regular running schudule and back to my normal diet. Goodbye comfort food. Hello being comfortable in my clothing.
So, if you are in a stressful situation, I've got 4 words for you: Don't eat too much.
That's all for tonight. Thank you.
Saturday, October 01, 2005
HAPPY OCTOBER!
Happy first day of October to you! I love Fall. I can't wait for the first crisp day when the heat of summer disappears and I get a little burst of energy brought on by the colder temperature. Sarah just invited me to go with her and the kids on their Fall Break vacation trip to the Carolinas. Hooray. Now I don't have to be sooo sad about missing Summer Break the last two years. (Boo! Hiss!) I guess I'll just ebay until after the trip, and then it will be time to find a real, albeit temporary, job until next school year starts.
Speaking of Fall, there's always a big debate in Christian circles about Halloween. Is it just a harmless holiday or is it a demonic ritual, or what? What's your opinion?
Speaking of Fall, there's always a big debate in Christian circles about Halloween. Is it just a harmless holiday or is it a demonic ritual, or what? What's your opinion?
Friday, September 30, 2005
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
HARDY COURT
Every time I watch a movie at a Rave or Cinemark Theater, I think about the improvements that movie houses have made in the last couple of decades. Can you imagine doing without stadium seats with cushy padding and cup holders? But for all their amenities, there’s a missing quality in these new megaplexes, something special that my old hometown theater had. It seemed like it was my theater, like it existed just for me.
The seats at the Hardy Court Theater were sticky, uncomfortable and smelled a little like dirty socks, but they were the first place I watched a big screen film. In 1986, I turned 12. Previous years my parents threw me a regular birthday bash with a cake and balloons. Desperate to grow up, that year I asked for something other than a kiddie party, so Mom drove my friend Steve and me to the theater. I can recall a few sketchy details of that evening. I know what gifts I received. My parents gave me a Swatch and an Ocean Pacific sweater; Steve gave me a Transformer. The food is a little less clear, but I think we went to Baskin Robbins for ice cream after the flick. More vivid are my memories of the theater and the movie. I perceived them as a milestone - a first taste of adult life, so both made a big impression.
Flight of the Navigator is about a 12-year-old boy (one hit wonder Joey Cramer) who’s abducted by aliens. He ends up in the care of a robot (voiced by Paul Reubens), and he must fight to return home. It’s a coming of age story, and the boy gradually learns to make his own decisions and to “navigate” life. There’s a time travel twist that complicates things for him. When the boy returns to Earth, he finds he has traveled 8 years into the future. To his confused dismay, everything once familiar is now different, and everyone he loved has changed. It’s that discontinuity, life flying by as he slowly matures, that I identify with now. It sustains the original memory - the connection fostered that night.
Many changes are driven by people’s constant desire for improvement – bigger, better, faster, more. So it’s appropriate, if not totally symbolic, that the Hardy Court Theater closed in 1987 to make room for a laser tag maze. A new and improved theater across town took its place. I saw many shows there as a teenager, but I never felt that same special connection with a movie or a theater, like I did at the Hardy Court watching Flight of the Navigator.
The seats at the Hardy Court Theater were sticky, uncomfortable and smelled a little like dirty socks, but they were the first place I watched a big screen film. In 1986, I turned 12. Previous years my parents threw me a regular birthday bash with a cake and balloons. Desperate to grow up, that year I asked for something other than a kiddie party, so Mom drove my friend Steve and me to the theater. I can recall a few sketchy details of that evening. I know what gifts I received. My parents gave me a Swatch and an Ocean Pacific sweater; Steve gave me a Transformer. The food is a little less clear, but I think we went to Baskin Robbins for ice cream after the flick. More vivid are my memories of the theater and the movie. I perceived them as a milestone - a first taste of adult life, so both made a big impression.
Flight of the Navigator is about a 12-year-old boy (one hit wonder Joey Cramer) who’s abducted by aliens. He ends up in the care of a robot (voiced by Paul Reubens), and he must fight to return home. It’s a coming of age story, and the boy gradually learns to make his own decisions and to “navigate” life. There’s a time travel twist that complicates things for him. When the boy returns to Earth, he finds he has traveled 8 years into the future. To his confused dismay, everything once familiar is now different, and everyone he loved has changed. It’s that discontinuity, life flying by as he slowly matures, that I identify with now. It sustains the original memory - the connection fostered that night.
Many changes are driven by people’s constant desire for improvement – bigger, better, faster, more. So it’s appropriate, if not totally symbolic, that the Hardy Court Theater closed in 1987 to make room for a laser tag maze. A new and improved theater across town took its place. I saw many shows there as a teenager, but I never felt that same special connection with a movie or a theater, like I did at the Hardy Court watching Flight of the Navigator.
Monday, September 26, 2005
THE MATCH GAME
Am I having an early midlife crises brought on by hurricane displacement? On a whim, I logged onto a match making service and took the personality quiz! Mostly I was taking it for self-discovery purposes, not expecting anyone to respond to my profile. I wondered whose personality the super computer would suggest as a match. Lo and behold, a couple of women (who live far away) have shown interest.
I'm more shy than I thought. It's taken me two days just to get used to the idea - and to work up the nerve, and today I'm going to respond to their inquiries.
What's your opinion of online match making? What about long distance relationships?
I'm more shy than I thought. It's taken me two days just to get used to the idea - and to work up the nerve, and today I'm going to respond to their inquiries.
What's your opinion of online match making? What about long distance relationships?
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
WIT
Sa and I just watched a chick flick: Mike Nichols' Wit. I picked it up at the library, thinking she would appreciate an Emma Thompson picture. At the end, while my sister was bawling her head off, she reached over and slugged me. "Don't ever bring another movie like that into my house."
Regardless of Sa's reaction, I think it was good for us to watch it. Seeing somebody die of cancer really puts things into perspective. Bravo to Ms. Thompson for her performance.
What is your favorite tearjerker?
Regardless of Sa's reaction, I think it was good for us to watch it. Seeing somebody die of cancer really puts things into perspective. Bravo to Ms. Thompson for her performance.
What is your favorite tearjerker?
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
HOLY WATER IN A SIPEE CUP
I took my neice to preschool this a.m. She was late. It took me 10 minutes to get her into the child safety seat. She was cooperative. It was the seat that gave me problems. Mysteriously, it was no longer attached to the car. And two of the straps were twisted. As I wrestled with the seat, struggling to reattach it and straighten the belts, it seemed to take on its very own personality (not a nice one, by any means). I think I will nickname the thing "Emily Rose." Please don't get the impression that I am planning to see that movie. Have you seen the preview? I had to get up and leave, it freaked me out so much.
When I pick up a novel, I may get a movie from the Hoover library tonight. I dropped off a couple of books there the other night for my sister. It was so much better than my last library - the one my class just visited on a field trip. Hoover has the nicest small branch I've ever seen, and it was packed at 9 at night! It has wireless internet, as well as computer stations. And the selection of books, periodicals and movies was top notch. Forget checking out the mall or country club. When I'm picking a new town, one of the things I'm going to check out is the library; I want to make sure I relocate to a community of avid readers.
I just finished reading my last novel, and I'm hungry for more. It took me a little longer than usual to finish it; my neices and nephew love to climb all over me while I'm trying to read. I usually ended up putting my book away and reading one of theirs, so at least we clocked some good literary time together. My favorite book of theirs so far is Love that Dog by Sharon Creech. It's written like a child's response journal. The main character begins writing poetry. It reminds me of my own students, and my own feelings about writing.
When I pick up a novel, I may get a movie from the Hoover library tonight. I dropped off a couple of books there the other night for my sister. It was so much better than my last library - the one my class just visited on a field trip. Hoover has the nicest small branch I've ever seen, and it was packed at 9 at night! It has wireless internet, as well as computer stations. And the selection of books, periodicals and movies was top notch. Forget checking out the mall or country club. When I'm picking a new town, one of the things I'm going to check out is the library; I want to make sure I relocate to a community of avid readers.
I just finished reading my last novel, and I'm hungry for more. It took me a little longer than usual to finish it; my neices and nephew love to climb all over me while I'm trying to read. I usually ended up putting my book away and reading one of theirs, so at least we clocked some good literary time together. My favorite book of theirs so far is Love that Dog by Sharon Creech. It's written like a child's response journal. The main character begins writing poetry. It reminds me of my own students, and my own feelings about writing.
Monday, September 19, 2005
A BURGER BY ANY OTHER NAME
I heard my surname more times during my first year of teaching than I had during the previous years of my life combined. The students whined it every few minutes, and with each request I hated the sound of my own name more. The effect was so nerve-wracking that my own last name began to echo in my waking thoughts and to haunt my dreams.
One day I had finally had enough of the students’ calling. I wrote my name on the board and crossed through it. “This is no longer my name,” I instructed. From now on, my new name is, “Here’s five dollars.” Use my new name in place of the old one. For example, if you need to borrow an eraser, you will now address me in this way: “Here’s five dollars, can I borrow an eraser?” If you need the bathroom pass, you should say, “Here’s five dollars, can I have the pass?”
The new name only lasted for a day, but it broke the strain of hearing my real name repeated so frequently. The nightmares stopped and my sense of humor returned.
That wasn't the first time work had given me funny dreams. For my first job, I did a stint at the local fast food dive the summer after my high school senior year. I had a girlfriend and dates to support, so I worked a lot of hours. After the first few weeks, I started dreaming about taking people's orders. Then one morning, when the alarm clock rang, instead of rolling over to turn it off, I woke up saying, "May I take your order?"
One day I had finally had enough of the students’ calling. I wrote my name on the board and crossed through it. “This is no longer my name,” I instructed. From now on, my new name is, “Here’s five dollars.” Use my new name in place of the old one. For example, if you need to borrow an eraser, you will now address me in this way: “Here’s five dollars, can I borrow an eraser?” If you need the bathroom pass, you should say, “Here’s five dollars, can I have the pass?”
The new name only lasted for a day, but it broke the strain of hearing my real name repeated so frequently. The nightmares stopped and my sense of humor returned.
That wasn't the first time work had given me funny dreams. For my first job, I did a stint at the local fast food dive the summer after my high school senior year. I had a girlfriend and dates to support, so I worked a lot of hours. After the first few weeks, I started dreaming about taking people's orders. Then one morning, when the alarm clock rang, instead of rolling over to turn it off, I woke up saying, "May I take your order?"
Saturday, September 17, 2005
REUNION
I'm sorry I didn't ask R. for a date. If I could live my senior year over, I'd ask her. I'd had a crush on her since kindergarten. She might have said yes. Insecurity stopped me from making the first move. Now I'll never know what might have been.
I have a handful of teenage regrets like this one, only a few. Summed up, I had a satisfying teen experience. High school was a fun time. It would be hard to ask for more, really. But I don't put those years on a pedestal, and they were not the best years of my life. In that respect, I'm in a slim minority when compared with my classmates.
Lets go back two years, to 2003. My 10 year high school reunion was painful. As I maneuvered the room between tables of ex-classmates, I got the sense that some voodoo witchdoctor had hexed everyone, removing the living part of them - and leaving shells. My diagnosis was an easy one - the smell of death was everywhere. Their dreams were beyond resurrection, and their funk overshadowed the festivity. And something else constantly resonated under the feeble party music "I was happy, once" was the evening's theme.
The star quarterback was bald, and the head cheerleader was fat. Their lives had turned out differently than they'd hoped, and they had changed for the worse. They had stopped making plans for the future and had lost hope in a happier tomorrow. My '93 graduation address to the class came back to mind several times during the evening, the words echoing back hollow and meaningless. Who had I been talking to that night? Were these really the same people? It wasn't just the gowns and mortar boards that were missing. Where were the bright faces, shining eyes, and hopeful grins? Maybe college, careers, marriage, and children were not what they had expected, but was it all so bad? Bad enough to make them bitter and hopeless? It was the saddest funeral I've ever attended: RIP youthful optimism. Not to mention good looks.
I (of course) found myself in a different place that summer night. I was optimistic about my very promising future. I looked better than I had in high school. My dreams weren't dead, just pruned. Life was balancing itself out so that I'd have a stable foundation for the next fifty years. Was it my faith in God that made me different? I thought so at the time. The witch doctor could just shove it. I was never going to be a zombie.
That was just pride on my part. Now I think I was immature. I hadn't avoided the same place the rest of my class was in. I just hadn't reached it yet - the place they had been living in for a year or two - or more. But here I am in that place now. The ghosts of my classmates greeted me upon arrival. They are glad to help me mourn my losses. Drawn to my dead dreams, they circle around me, whispering, "I used to be happy." Should I mimic their refrain? Stop dreaming? Lose faith? What am I doing?
I have a handful of teenage regrets like this one, only a few. Summed up, I had a satisfying teen experience. High school was a fun time. It would be hard to ask for more, really. But I don't put those years on a pedestal, and they were not the best years of my life. In that respect, I'm in a slim minority when compared with my classmates.
Lets go back two years, to 2003. My 10 year high school reunion was painful. As I maneuvered the room between tables of ex-classmates, I got the sense that some voodoo witchdoctor had hexed everyone, removing the living part of them - and leaving shells. My diagnosis was an easy one - the smell of death was everywhere. Their dreams were beyond resurrection, and their funk overshadowed the festivity. And something else constantly resonated under the feeble party music "I was happy, once" was the evening's theme.
The star quarterback was bald, and the head cheerleader was fat. Their lives had turned out differently than they'd hoped, and they had changed for the worse. They had stopped making plans for the future and had lost hope in a happier tomorrow. My '93 graduation address to the class came back to mind several times during the evening, the words echoing back hollow and meaningless. Who had I been talking to that night? Were these really the same people? It wasn't just the gowns and mortar boards that were missing. Where were the bright faces, shining eyes, and hopeful grins? Maybe college, careers, marriage, and children were not what they had expected, but was it all so bad? Bad enough to make them bitter and hopeless? It was the saddest funeral I've ever attended: RIP youthful optimism. Not to mention good looks.
I (of course) found myself in a different place that summer night. I was optimistic about my very promising future. I looked better than I had in high school. My dreams weren't dead, just pruned. Life was balancing itself out so that I'd have a stable foundation for the next fifty years. Was it my faith in God that made me different? I thought so at the time. The witch doctor could just shove it. I was never going to be a zombie.
That was just pride on my part. Now I think I was immature. I hadn't avoided the same place the rest of my class was in. I just hadn't reached it yet - the place they had been living in for a year or two - or more. But here I am in that place now. The ghosts of my classmates greeted me upon arrival. They are glad to help me mourn my losses. Drawn to my dead dreams, they circle around me, whispering, "I used to be happy." Should I mimic their refrain? Stop dreaming? Lose faith? What am I doing?
Wednesday, September 14, 2005
GET A HAIRCUT AND GET A REAL JOB
Where do I begin? OK. First off, thanks to everyone who's been praying for my family and friends. God is faithful!
Christen is alive! She was rescued during the hurricane and taken to a total stranger's house, where she has been staying without phone access. She couldn't have called us anyway, because she did not have anyone's phone number memorized. She had plugged them into the cell phone and all she had to do was enter the shortcut code or say our names. Not knowing anyone's phone number! There's a new hazard of modern living! I realized that I'm just as guilty; I only know two phone numbers of loved ones. I guess I need to memorize some more just in case I lose my phone during an emergency.
My apartment was gross - black mold and mildew. It took two days to box up my stuff and drive it up to my parents' house for storage. During that time the exposure to the toxins in the apartment made me ill - I'll spare you a list of symptoms. Man, I wish I had worn gloves and a mask. I thought I was smarter than that!
I'm shuffling between family member's houses until I can figure out what I'm doing. Steve is still serving in New Orleans, so his place is my eventual destination. Jenny is staying with my cousin in Hattiesburg since Southern Miss Hattiesburg classes started this week. They are redoing her apartment for her, but it will take a couple of weeks. My apartment complex released me from my lease since my place is unlivable. They said they were just glad I turned my keys in since most of the residents had left and not turned in their keys or told the manager if they were coming back or not.
Terry and Jo went down to Florida for a couple of weeks to get away from the mess and sort things out. Terry already is starting to sound normal again. I think we are all coming out of the shock we've been in. I got a haircut today and shaved. I was starting to look like Tom Hanks in that shipwreck movie. I guess getting a haircut is moving one step closer to finding a job (if that song is right). How much longer will I be living out of a suitcase?
Christen is alive! She was rescued during the hurricane and taken to a total stranger's house, where she has been staying without phone access. She couldn't have called us anyway, because she did not have anyone's phone number memorized. She had plugged them into the cell phone and all she had to do was enter the shortcut code or say our names. Not knowing anyone's phone number! There's a new hazard of modern living! I realized that I'm just as guilty; I only know two phone numbers of loved ones. I guess I need to memorize some more just in case I lose my phone during an emergency.
My apartment was gross - black mold and mildew. It took two days to box up my stuff and drive it up to my parents' house for storage. During that time the exposure to the toxins in the apartment made me ill - I'll spare you a list of symptoms. Man, I wish I had worn gloves and a mask. I thought I was smarter than that!
I'm shuffling between family member's houses until I can figure out what I'm doing. Steve is still serving in New Orleans, so his place is my eventual destination. Jenny is staying with my cousin in Hattiesburg since Southern Miss Hattiesburg classes started this week. They are redoing her apartment for her, but it will take a couple of weeks. My apartment complex released me from my lease since my place is unlivable. They said they were just glad I turned my keys in since most of the residents had left and not turned in their keys or told the manager if they were coming back or not.
Terry and Jo went down to Florida for a couple of weeks to get away from the mess and sort things out. Terry already is starting to sound normal again. I think we are all coming out of the shock we've been in. I got a haircut today and shaved. I was starting to look like Tom Hanks in that shipwreck movie. I guess getting a haircut is moving one step closer to finding a job (if that song is right). How much longer will I be living out of a suitcase?
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